Putting the ID in idiotic把ID的白痴
ISN’T IT reassuring that the finest minds of their generation are serving in Gordon’s government.是不是宽慰的是，最优秀的头脑，他们这一代人是在职在戈登的政府。 Take home secretary Jacqui Smith and her brilliant solution to the problem of compulsory identity cards: making them voluntary!以英国内政大臣杰葵史密斯和她灿烂的办法来解决强制身份证：使他们自愿！ This oxymoronic U-turn sets a new benchmark in government dithering.这oxymoronic的掉头树立了一个新基准，政府抖动。
The whole point about identity cards - or so Tony Blair told us - was that they were meant to be held by everyone.整点约身份证-或者使英国首相布莱尔告诉我们-是他们是意味着将举行由每一个人。
That way, wrong uns, illegals and people with dark faces (sorry, “criminally profiled terrorist suspects”) would be easy to spot because they wouldn’t have said card.这样一来，错了UNS ，偷渡者的人与黑暗的面孔（对不起， "刑事责任异型恐怖嫌犯" ） ，将容易被发现，因为他们也不会说卡。
They could then be banged up for weeks without charge under the proposed law on detention of suspected terrorists.他们然后可以banged了几个星期未经起诉，根据拟议法被拘留的恐怖嫌疑人。
Now that the cards are voluntary, the terrorists, illegals, etc, will not even have to go to the inconvenience of forging their own ID cards.目前该卡是自愿的，恐怖分子，非法移民等，甚至不会有去不便锻造自己的身份证。
Only those who actually have the cards will be liable to arbitrary arrest and detention by the police, when they inevitably confuse Mr Oswald B Linden with Osama bin Laden.只有那些真正有卡会被任意逮捕和拘留的，由警察，当他们无可避免混淆主席奥斯瓦尔德b林登与奥萨马。
We can sleep safely in our beds, secure in the knowledge that they know where we live.我们可以安全地睡在我们的床，安全的，在知识，他们知道我们的生活。
In her further wisdom, Ms Smith has made students an exception to voluntary compulsion.在她的进一步智慧女士，史密斯已经取得了学生的一个例外，以自愿强迫。 They will all be expected to have identity cards.他们都将可望拥有身份证。
Which is inspired because, of course, students are the one group in society that can be guaranteed to lose their identity cards, after using them to cut up lines of coke or whatever.这是鼓舞，因为，当然，学生是一组在社会上能得到保证，以丧失自己的身份卡，用后他们降低了线路的焦炭或诸如此类。 This means that the government won’t have to go to the trouble of losing the identity cards itself, in the way it lost the child benefit records of 25 million citizens.这意味着，政府将不会去的麻烦，失去了身份证本身，在这样失去了儿童福利金的纪录， 25多万市民。
Senior managers at HM Revenue and Customs have been amply rewarded for losing our bank accounts, national insurance numbers and pension details and posting them in a Jiffy bag to al-Qaeda.高级管理人员在国税局和海关已经给予重奖，为失去我们的银行账户，国家保险号码和退休金的细节和张贴在jiffy袋盖达。 A grateful government has increased their bonuses by more than 50%.感激政府加大了他们的奖金由50 ％以上。
You might find it surprising that officials in dysfunctional government departments are getting any bonuses at all, but incompetence on this scale doesn’t come cheap.你也许觉得奇怪的官员在功能失调的政府部门得到任何奖金，在所有的，但无能，这种规模并不便宜。
It takes brains to lose £3.3 billion in overpaid tax credits, and civil servants need proper incentives or, heck, they might go to the private sector.它的大脑失去£ 33亿多税收抵免，以及公务员需要适当的鼓励，或者heck ，他们可能会到私营部门。
Talking of which, Gordon Brown himself must surely be in line for some kind of bonus for losing £4bn of our money on the bullion markets.说到这，英国财政大臣布朗本人一定是按照某种奖金为亏损40亿英镑，我们的钱放在金银市场。
Gordo sold most of Britain’s gold reserves off the back of a lorry eight years ago when it was worth $275 an ounce. gordo售出大部分英国的黄金储备过后面的一辆货车在8年前，当它是价值275美元盎司。 Now the yellow stuff is trading at nearly a $1000, which makes GB the biggest rogue trader since Jerome Kerviel.现在黄河的东西是交易近1000元，这使得绿化地带最大的无赖交易员自杰罗姆kerviel 。
You can see why banks are so keen on hiring top politicians like Tony Blair when they leave office.你可以看到，为什么银行如此热衷于聘用高层政治家们都喜欢英国首相布莱尔时，他们离开办公室。 I bet Societie General will be lining up to hire Mr Brown, who will be able to name his price even if he can’t price his name.我敢打赌， societie一般会排队聘请布朗先生，他们将能够姓名，他的代价，即使他不能物价他的名字。
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